So You Know

Loved You Once by Clara Mae (lyrics by AirwaveMusicTV)

We don’t need to be best friends
We don’t need to hang again
But tell me why we have to be strangers?
‘Cause I loved you once

Surprise! As I was making the current playlist post before this one I found this song by an artist I like. I can tell upon first listen that it’s going to make its way to my playlist immediately. Especially as at the moment of writing this my ex keeps texting me and apologizing for how he treated me when we were dating and not appreciating me. That’s the gist of it at least. He’s sent me two or three of those texts in just the past three weeks now that I’m back in town. Our relationship only lasted for nine months and was mostly long distance. We broke up in summer of 2017. It’s summer of 2019 as I publish this. -___-

I can’t be nice anymore. It isn’t working. I could be his friend because I now know and firmly believe what everyone told me when he and I were together: that I can do way better than him. It sounds harsh, but it’s true. I don’t want him back and there is nothing he could say or do to change my mind. I’m not that naive and desperate as I was when we got together; nor will I ever be again. That being said, as Ariana Grande put it and I’ve been telling him over a year before the song got released: Thank You, Next. I could be his friend, because I feel this way.

But I don’t believe he can. Unfortunately I’ve dealt with clingy people like him before and any form of niceness just encourages them. Asking to hang out like friends (when our “dates” were us watching movies or shows at his house anyway) that would just not be a good idea. I am not about to even imply to his delusional mind that I want anything more than a friendship which is how he’d interpret my friendship, I’m sure because it has happened before.

It’s been two years and he says he can’t let it go. Two years is long enough. If you can’t move on J, at least leave me alone.

Note: Picture from Pexel’s Free Photo Library